"E. Julius" (soonerfrommi)
01/23/2015 at 18:18 • Filed to: Mistakes
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"E. Julius" (soonerfrommi)
01/23/2015 at 18:18 • Filed to: Mistakes | 7
| 17 |
Found this old gem. Back when I first started driving, I messed up my car hooning in a snowy parking lot. Of course, I took it to my family's mechanic in secret. When it turned out I couldn't hide it, I did what anyone would do: draw a diagram of completely fictional circumstances, leave it on the kitchen counter for my parents to see when they got home and leave to get dinner with my girlfriend. This is that diagram:
I was 16, and had taken my 1996 Ford Escort to my freshly powdered high school parking lot for some glorious winter hooning. All was going well, until upon leaving I was startled by a janitor wearing all black with a black salt spreader on an unlit sidewalk. I ended up slamming my passenger side tire into the curb, and after a quick inspection at a nearby gas station I determined that the car was solid enough to limp home, despite some unsettling noises.
The next day after school, I took my car to our mechanic and told him to just take a look at it for me and keep it quiet. He said he wouldn't tell my parents, but I ended up needing a new tie rod end, new control arm, new bushings, new wheel bearing, and I think some other stuff I don't remember. All in all, about $600 worth of work that would take more than a few hours for him to finish.
Knowing there was no conceivable way I could explain the sudden lightness of my bank account and absence of my car, I did what I described in the first paragraph. Although I ended up just getting to drive our spare car (2001 Ford Explorer) all winter, so the moral of the story was kind of lost.
ttyymmnn
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 18:24 |
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When I was about 17 or 18, I was out with friends and drove the car into a curb, blowing the tire. We changed it, and I went home. I told my dad that I was driving when an oncoming car crossed the center line, and I had to swerve to avoid it, hitting the curb. He bought it. Or at least, he pretended to believe it. I didn't draw a diagram, though.
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E. Julius
> ttyymmnn
01/23/2015 at 18:26 |
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The diagram was so I could avoid explaining it in person. It failed (obviously), as my dad immediately called me and asked for an explanation (which I botched, horribly). Your story reminded me of a friend who did pretty much the same thing as you, except he said somebody had left a cinder block in the middle of the road. It's funny how many things parents "believe".
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ttyymmnn
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 18:30 |
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Or choose to believe. I have a 12-year-0ld who will be driving in a few years. I think I'll be in a similar situation, as most parents are. Sometimes, you have to choose to believe a story and hope that the kid learned an important lesson in the process. Hopefully, they won't learn about the efficacy of lying. If my kid told me a similar story, I might say, "I think your story is bullshit, but I'll accept it. This time. Next time, you're painting the house to pay for the repairs."
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E. Julius
> ttyymmnn
01/23/2015 at 18:34 |
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That's actually a really interesting peek into parent psychology (I'm only 20 now), thanks! Starting to get to the age where I realize how obnoxious I must have been at times…
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ttyymmnn
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 18:42 |
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If only there were a handbook for parenting. You have to use your own experiences and common sense and make this shit up as you go. Be honest, be fair, and hope they learn the right way to handle things. Your trying to make the repair yourself shows you have a good sense of responsibility. Pass that on to your kids and you'll do fine. Honestly, I would have been upset about the note (as your dad was). I would rather you had dealt with it face to face. But you learned that lesson, too. Good drawing, though. Even if it was BS.
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E. Julius
> ttyymmnn
01/23/2015 at 18:52 |
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Thanks! I might just keep this comment tucked away in my little folder of "Things that might be useful someday" (I mean that in the best way possible).
Steve in Manhattan
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 19:04 |
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Senior prom, taking my date to dinner. My first time in a tiered garage, smacked the side (rear wheel well) of mom's '71 Coronet into a cement post, creating a dimple. Dad thought someone must have dinged it in a parking lot. I said yeah, sure, bad luck. He's dead now. Mom still doesn't know.
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E. Julius
> Steve in Manhattan
01/23/2015 at 19:06 |
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Hopefully our parents don't read Oppo!
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Steve in Manhattan
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 19:08 |
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Mom doesn't even have an email address, much less the internet. I did tell her my dad taught me to drive at 14 (2 years early) on the streets of DC, and she didn't believe me.
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ttyymmnn
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 19:39 |
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Just don't come after me if it doesn't work!
Local Miata Bro
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 19:50 |
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My friend used your same tactic. He was trying to drift his 1998 Toyota corolla when he slid into a curb. He claimed he was trying to avoid hitting a dog in the road. He ended up bending the Sub-frame as well as some other things. His dad bought it and gave him his sister's Buick century as she had just bought a new car. The moral of the story was lost, but man that kid looks like a professional rally driver in that Buick on snowy roads.
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E. Julius
> Local Miata Bro
01/23/2015 at 19:56 |
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Old Buicks (hand me downs from the grandparents or parents) were THE car at my high school. I'd say 35–45% of students had one at some point. I'll always enjoy the sight of one of those babies being tossed around in the white stuff.
deekster_caddy
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 20:05 |
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I lied like a bastard from somewhere around age 13 to 19. Somewhere in my early 20s I realized how much I had sucked at lying, and what it had done to my reputation. It took years to build that trust again. The only thing I didn't lie about was when I rearended a van because I was fiddling with the boom box I had on my front seat. Then my parents FINALLY let me replace the AM radio in my car with a head unit that had FM and cassette! I was lucky enough to find a similar car in a junkyard nearby to get a new hood and radiator support from... but I still have that car today, so it must have been worth fixing. I guess.
https://www.flickr.com/photos/6509315…
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E. Julius
> deekster_caddy
01/23/2015 at 20:16 |
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It's quite fetching if you ask me! And even if you're good at lying, you'll just have to work harder and harder or keep people from getting to close to you to stop it all from collapsing.
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deekster_caddy
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 20:40 |
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Yeah that was my problem - I wasn't able to keep them all straight and almost always got caught...
OPPOsaurus WRX
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 20:46 |
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yea I went into a parking lot at 45 mhp. Took out the first car. That car hit 2 more. My parents showed up as the cops were measuring my skid marks.
shop-teacher
> E. Julius
01/23/2015 at 23:58 |
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My first accident was me rear-ending my best friend's Ranger, while we were both delivering pizza. No damage to the Ranger, $375 damage to my Oldsmobile.
I told my dad the truth, because I had already learned I wasn't capable of lieing to him. I thought he was going to be furious (even though it was my car, that I had bought and paid for), but he just laughed in my face.
He had the same reaction 6 months later, when I came home with my first speeding ticket.